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Black Cloud
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Joe Budden
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1
Nothing stays the same forever, not even me
2
Check this, check it
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Something must've changed me, niggas might defame me
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But things that used to taint me, no longer seem to restrain me
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Strangely I'm no longer sad, mad or angry
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Shame-ably it pains me, feeling like this just ain't me
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Mainly what do I tell all the people that thanked me
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Mainly those who ordain me, aside from can you blame me
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Motivation again was supplying me is no longer providing me
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Jason Williams something killed whatever was driving me
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Worrying less about the past more about the now
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Less about what I'm going through more about the how
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It's for certain it's been thirty years being fit for hurting
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Now I'm a different person with nothing to overcome in the mist of burdens
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For certain, got 6 figures in my sock drawer
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And honestly this year I expect to make a lot more
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It's hard to live without a budget when life is corrupted
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In a house that's so peaceful that I'm trying to disrupt it
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Scream fuck it not because I have to but because I love it
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Which makes me as fake as the puppets that I speak of disgusted
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Without a paddle up shit's creek
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Dig deep and see it ain't life it's just me
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So be warned as I'm putting on like I'm deformed
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Only so y'all can accept it as being my norm
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Maybe I quit working on me, maybe I given up
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Maybe I been lying to myself maybe I give a fuck.
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[Chorus]
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It's enough to make you black out, pull a mac out
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Aim it at the sky while I'm running from a black cloud
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Every day we playin' cat and mouse as I watch it hoverin' over my glass house
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It's enough to make you spazz out, pull a mac out
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Aim it at the sky while I'm running from a black cloud
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Tired enough for me to pass out, tired of running from the black cloud.
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I say it loud hoping someone can hear me clearly
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Trying to make my girl get it she don't know that it's very scary
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But she's a nympho she can come barely near me
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She still want the God in her, think she's mary mary
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The prettiest bitches just want to service me
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While niggas prettiest bitches wouldn't get a word from me
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Some of you haven't heard from me, some of you wouldn't mind murking me
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Found that news funny likes its straight from Ron Burgundy
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These niggas ain't never seen dough
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They can't dream though I bump into 'em in between shows
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People say I'm emo, what that really mean though?
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Is though the song can't breathe I actually make it seem so
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I lost loved ones because they couldn't deal with me
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Cherish whoever still with me though the marriage be killed in me
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Normally it's just me and my lonely mind
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Everyone storm is different so this forecast is only mine
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Fans recognize my misery uplifted me
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Shifted me to my epitome, guess the curse is a gift to me
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Maybe it's serendipity, maybe it's weighing on me physically
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Maybe I should man up and tell God not to solicit me
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Been medicated, meditated
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Sedated, hated
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Character assassinated, all theses years I masqueraded
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Hard headed, if it was on my mind I had to say it
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Tongue on the devil's pitchfork to see how disaster tasted
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Rap is fabricated, rappers are so exaggerated
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Wouldn't be scared of the truth if they weren't castrated
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Grab a mag, spray it, surrounded by people to shoot it before me
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Better unconditionally love my beautiful ugly
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Now lemme speak to who I cater to
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Would you love me to sang before my weeks were not favorable
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Promised to maintain being unique but relatable
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All while suffering from a disease that could do away with you
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Poetry on the beat, spoken-word for the masses
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Therapy over pro-tools, every word is on acid
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Consonants on Kush, every vowel is blunted
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Highly wanted this whole organization privately funded
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This is bigger than the Eiffle, this is alert to public
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Had a cop us by our tunnels and our bridges with the rifle
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Sentences meant to stifle, this is a man aching
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This is the dam breaking, contraband in the making
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This is panic unveiling, got potential but I never met it
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He be trying to come over, it seem like God won't let it
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Either he never got my invite or he just dismissed it
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But if all I'm hearing are the sounds of blackness, why am I pessimistic?
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You'll never progress if you'll never try
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All I ask, let every word I birth never die
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My wings spread, but when I'm at the sky
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Weather didn't change like I thought and had me petrified.
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[Chorus]
Joe Budden - Black Cloud
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