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Useless But Important Information
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Jimmy Buffett
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I've got some useless but important information
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Got a hot tip on a filly in the third
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Skyping with a pretty girl
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Who lives halfway around the world
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Won't be long 'til everybody's heard
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I have sworn and I cannot reveal my sources
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I can tell you though, that it's not Nancy Grace
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I've been forced to change my plans
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Won't be travelin' to Sudan
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My destination could be outer space
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Where am I bound, it don't matter
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Pocket dialing halfway 'cross the nation
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What do I hear? Mindless chatter
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All this useless and important information
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There are camera crews for blocks outside her trailer
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The whole thing's going viral as we sing
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Are they fake or are they real
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Looks like her boyfriend cut a deal
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She'll be Dancing With The Stars before the spring
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You see, she spent her whole Katrina check on implants
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Crisis over destiny fulfilled
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Blue tarp or silicone
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Either way the money's gone
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I guess there's more than one way to rebuild
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Who really cares? Trillions twitter
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I can't comprehend the titillation
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Breakin' news, world's in the shitter
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Covering useless and important information
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Gold starts out in the ground 'til very clever men
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Dig it up, then weigh it, they they bury it again
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Mostly comes from Africa and ends up in Fort Knox
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Only gets it's value from the guards and chains and locks
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Pretty rocks
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Where am I bound, it don't matter
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Pocket dialing halfway 'cross the nation
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What do I hear? Mindless chatter
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All this useless and important information
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Where am I bound, it don't matter
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Whole world's now viewed with car wreck fascination
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If I were you I'd just keep driving
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Past all this useless and important information
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All this useless and important information...
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Useless...
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Important...
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Useless...
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