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I Was Hoping
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Alanis Morissette
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1
As we were talking outside it was cold
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We were shivering yet warmed by the subject matter
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My wife is in the next room, we've been having troubles you know
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Please don't tell her or anyone but I need to talk to somebody
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You said, "Wouldn't it be a shame if I knew how great I was
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Five minutes before I'd died I'd be filled with such regret
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Before I took my last breath" and I said
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"But you're willing to tell me this now
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And you're not going to die anytime soon"
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And I said, "I haven't been eating chicken or meat or anything"
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And you said, "Yes but you've been wearing leather"
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And laughed and said, "We're at the top of the food chain
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And yes you're still a fine woman" and I cringed
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I was hoping
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I was hoping we could heal each other
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I was hoping
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I was hoping we could be raw together
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We left the restaurant where the head waiter in his 60's said
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"Goodbye sir, thank you for your business
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Sir, you're successful and established, sir
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We like the frequency with which you dine here sir and your money and
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When I walked by they said "Thank you too dear"
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I was all pigtails and cords
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And there was a day when I would've said something like
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"Hey dude I could buy and sell this place so kiss it"
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I too once thought I was owed something
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I was hoping
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I was hoping we could challenge each other
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I was hoping
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I was hoping we could crack each other up
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I too thought that when proved wrong I lost somehow
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I too once thought life was cruel and
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It's a cycle really
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You think I'm withdrawing and guilt tripping you
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I think you're insensitive
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And I don't feel heard and I said, "Do you believe we are
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Fundamentally judgmental, fundamentally evil?"
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And you said, "Yes"
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I said, "I don't believe in revenge, in right or wrong, good or bad"
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You said, "Well what about the man that I saw handcuffed
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In the emergency room bleeding after beating his kid"
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And she threw a shoe at his head
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And I think what he did was wrong
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And I would've had a hard time feeling compassion for him
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I had to watch my tone for fear of having you feel judged
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I was hoping
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I was hoping we could dance together
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I was hoping
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I was hoping we could be creamy together
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