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Unnecessary Pain
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Joe Budden
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1
I still picture your affection
2
I still hear you like we're talkin' on the phone
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I still feel it
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Like you're right there holdin' on to me
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But words cannot explain
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We will never be us again
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Everything has changed
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Or is that just you givin' up again?
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More unnecessary pain
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I would ask how we ended up here, but I drove
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And you allowed me
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Or maybe it's only me that remembers it
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'Cause you're so easily told about me
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But not once while we were on that road did you doubt me
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Played your position, writin' out our books
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I noticed a page missin', blame it on the age difference
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I see you in the club, now days you're resistant
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You used to get excited just to never pay admission
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Lookin' for the old you, wishin' shit was normal
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Tried to mold you and you ended up with it on you
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Live around the corner, yeah we ain't even formal
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So I'm askin' God, why you alive and I gotta mourn you
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Word, I see you got a little crew now
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A bunch of ugly broke bitches I know better than
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And I ain't tryna say them hoes usin' you
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Well actually who would I be kiddin'? Yes I am
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I see your life from far and something's off with it
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It's my fault and shit, I shoulda never altered it
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I sold a dream when you couldn't have known the cost of it
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Knew my love came with a pain and I still offered it
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Seein' your weight loss, knowin' I'm the cause of it
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If that ain't my signature, then shit, somebody forgin' it
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But you think I ain't hurt, like it ain't no guilt in me
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Like it ain't killin' me, I'm out here on a killin' spree
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A sickness, I ain't found a way to nurse it yet
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Like I ain't a nervous wreck, like it's no reverse effect
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Internal bleedin' and the cuts run deep
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Every time I leave one love, a loved one leaves
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I wish I could take the pain away, but only yours
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I'll be fine if I remain this way
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See I deserve whatever punishment I get
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You could sentence me to years
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Of hearin' my vic's voice even when nothin' is there
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I still picture your affection
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I still hear you like we're talkin' on the phone
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Still feel it
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Like you're right there holdin' on to me
48
But words cannot explain
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We will never be us again
50
Everything has changed
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Or is that just you givin' up again?
52
More unnecessary pain
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I done gone so long not givin' a fuck
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That it's no longer erratic, now it's a normal habit
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Even when I go my way, I gotta have it
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Bury me with my sweats on and bitches in the casket
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All the waiters and words, I let 'em loom on
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Every verse real enough to write it on my tombstone
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And so you know how real that paranoia be
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Even make me think my demise is avoidin' me
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The sick part is I withstand that abuse
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Long as the fans are amused, am I a man or a muse?
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Never sugarcoat it when I hand it to the youth
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Fell from all over the world, and always landed in the booth
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I hold music in such a high regard that
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To this day I still feel like it's destiny
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And to these fans that I once gave my life for
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I gotta tell you that it's not much left in me
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Yeah, and not that it's growin' old
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But years of bearin' my soul is takin' it's toll
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Took a father from his son, but is it best that way?
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I'm so fucked up inside I can't regret that Trey
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Hold my head up high at the gates after my time's up
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They say you saved somebody's life by givin' mine up
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Wouldn't be the first time that I went without
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Chased my true love so much that I resent it now
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You can put this in the scriptures like it's sacred
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To live with it, but hate it is to giveth then to take it
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Goin' through the motions, it'll strip a nigga naked
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I guess it's for a cause if all the kids are gonna play it
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Trust me, I ain't been the same yet
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You'll stop and stare any time you see a trainwreck
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And I'll take whatever punishment they give
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You can sentence me to years
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Of hearin' that fan's voice even when nothin' is there
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I still picture your affection
87
I still hear you like we're talkin' on the phone
88
Still feel it
89
Like you're right there holdin' on to me
90
But words cannot explain
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We will never be us again
92
Everything has changed
93
Or is that just you givin' up again?
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More unnecessary pain
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Still learnin' to live with
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People coming in and out my life
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The ones who matter show it over time
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That's why they always stay on my mind
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So I live in reality
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Nobody else matters to me but you, you, you
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Why try to hide the truth?
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I still picture your affection
103
I still hear you like we're talkin' on the phone
104
Still feel it
105
Like you're right there holdin' on to me
106
But words cannot explain
107
We will never be us again
108
Everything has changed
109
Or is that just you givin' up again?
110
More unnecessary pain
111
I'm tried of feeling this
112
I gotta live with this
Emanny - I Messed Up (Explicit Version) ...
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