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The Mayor of Pussytown
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Adam Sandler
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1
Yo it's 2004 and all you candy asses thinkin ya'll real pussies
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ya'll ain't seen shit yet
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eh yo man let em know
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Oh yeah, guess who's back
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it's the mother fuckin pussy with the little nutsack
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don't care about cheddar or the paper chase
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i'm a fuckin grown man with zits on my face
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a straight up chicken shit
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a pansy ass punk
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If i'm if i'm guarding your ass it's an automatic slam dunk
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while thugs are at the party bustin all ya'lls asses
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I'm hidin in the corner wonderin where the fuck's my glasses
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Can't afford no rims my
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my fuckin dick's so small no bitch can suck it
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I don't pop 9's i got weak rhymes
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back in 9 duce i got pissed on 10 times
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I roll solo i ain't got no clue
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i said please don't hit me more than a cow says moo
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afraid of heights i'm a-scared in the dark
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i walk an extra 3 miles to avoid crazy fucks in the park
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denied by the bloods, turned down by the crypts
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my fuckin auntie kicked my ass and she got 2 plastic hips
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when i step to the club feel free to stare me down
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because I just got re-elected the mayor of pussytown
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May-or-of-pus-sy-town
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When bangers hit the street i stay home and watch tv
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slumped out on the couch so no one can see
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unless I hear somebody knockin on my door
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then you'll see me crawlin cross the mother fuckin floor
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i've been a fuckin coward every day of my life,
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that's why I pretend I don't know everyone's banging my wife
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i won't sit on the porch, i don't want no trouble
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i'm more afraid of goin out than the fuckin boy in a bubble
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when the shit goes down i make a break so fast
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look like a mother fuckin rocket goin past
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searchin for the sneakiest place to hide
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straight into the ladies room, ain't got no pride
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slippin slidin, runnin hidin
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you know damn well it's a scooter i'm ridin
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oh no here we go, out come the glocks
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i take off so fast i pop out my socks
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you gonna fuck with me, i'll cry then run
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i called the cops when i got shot with a fuckin squirt gun
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He clams up he shuts down
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His pants he almost shits
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He'll even look the other way if you grab his grandma's tits
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well I had a little poodle but neighbor's stoled her
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i'd shoot her with an ak but the kick hurts my shoulder
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i can't pop no gun and i can't fist fight
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hell i'm afraid to take out the fuckin garbage at night
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I use the steps in the pool cause i'm terrified to dive
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don't fuck with my floaties they's whats keepin me alive, bitch
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never drank remy never delt crack
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one time I smoked weed i had a panic attack
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if you're looking for my dick in the mens locker room
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just bring your binoculars with a fuckin super zoom
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naw i'm just playin i don't fuckin change in there
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the one time I did got my bush sprayed off with nair
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but did I stick up for myself no fuckin doubt
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i did what i do best, i broke the fuck out
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i ain't lookin at you i ain't tryin to front
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it's aight with me you called my jimmy a cunt
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freakin sneakin crawlin creepin
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when the gangs are bangin i'm in the basement sleepin
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i'm straight from the streets seen trouble in every side
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when the shit hits the fan i throw on a fuckin disguise
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fake nose fake wig fake beard
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it all worked pretty good
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sometimes I just use a map and a funny accent
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and pretend I got lost in the hood mother fucker
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now all you coward mother fuckers out there
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walkin round with your head hangin low
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just cause you ate one dick
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just know
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my man the mayor, had to suck off his whole high school
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case closed
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May-or-of-pus-sy-town
Hello Muddah, Hello Fadduh (Camp Granada...
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