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Pirelli's Miracle Elixir
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Sweeney Todd
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1
TOBIAS:
2
Ladies and gentlemen,
3
May I have your attention, perlease?
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Do you wake every morning in shame and despair,
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Discover your pillow is covered with hair?
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What ought not to be there?
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Well, ladies and gentlemen,
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From now on you can waken at ease
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You may never again have a worry or care,
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I will show you a miracle, marvelous rare,
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Gentlemen you are about to see something what rose from the dead,
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On the top of my head!
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'Twas Pirelli's Miracle Elixir,
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That's what did the trick sir,
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True, sir, true,
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Was it quick, sir?
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Did it in a tick, sir?
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Just like an elixir ought to do.
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How about a bottle mister?
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Only costs a penny, guaranteed.
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Does Pirelli's stimulate the growth, sir?
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You can have my oath sir,
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'Tis unique.
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Rub a minute,
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Stimulatin' i'' it?
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Soon you'll have to thin it once a week.
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TODD:
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Pardon me ma'am what's that awful stench?
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LOVETT:
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Are we standing near an open trench?
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TODD:
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Must be standing near an open trench.
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TOBIAS:
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Try Pirelli's Miracle Elixir,
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Anything what's slick, sir,
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Soon sprouts curls,
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Try Pirelli's,
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When they see how thick, sir,
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You can have your pick, sir, of the girls!
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Want to buy a bottle missus?
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TODD:
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What is this?
43
LOVETT:
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What is this?
45
TODD:
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Smells like piss.
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LOVETT:
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Smells like - phew!
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TODD:
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Looks like piss.
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LOVETT:
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Wouldn't touch it if I was you, dear!
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TODD:
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This is piss. Piss with ink.
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TOBIAS:
56
Let Pirelli's activate your roots, sir.
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TODD:
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Keep it off your boots, sir, eats right through.
59
TOBIAS:
60
Yes, get Pirelli's!
61
Use a bottle of it!
62
Ladies seem to love it "”
63
LOVETT:
64
Flies do too.
Sweeney Todd- Pirelli's Miracle Elixir
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