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The Adventures Of The Cow
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Adam Sandler
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Performed by adam sandler, frank, and randi
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Transcribed by a fan
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"and now a cow at bat in the bottom of the 6th inning of a little league game getting hit by a pitch"
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[baseball sounds and cow bell ringing,ball is hit and hits cow]
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Cow: moo
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"and now a cow who goes skydiving for the very first time, and thinks his parachute isn't gonna open when it finnally does 40 feet from the ground"
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[plane sounds]
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M1: alright cow, don't even think about just jump and enjoy the ride down, quit being a pansy and do it
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Cow: moo
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[ripcord sounds]
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Cow: moo,mrr
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[parachute opens]
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Cow: moow
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[thud]
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"and now a cow who goes to the chicken hot drivethru and then gets halfway home before realising they forgot his french fries"
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[cow opening paper bag]
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Cow: moo,moo
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[car screeches, and turns back around]
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Cow: mrr
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"and now a cow winning first prise in the bellyflop contest at spring break and then realises he can't swim"
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[cow walking towards pool, big splash]
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Cow: moo
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[crowd cheering]
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Cow: mrr,mrr
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[underwater moo]
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"and now a club gets a dance at a classy strip club, when a bouncer notices he doesn't have any shoes on"
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F1: ohh baby you like it when I dance with you
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Cow: moo
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F1: uh uh uh, you can't touch that
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Cow: moo
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Bouncer: keep your hands off the girl
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Cow: moo
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Bouncer: hey cow, you got no shoes on you gotta leave
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Cow: moo
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M2: hey watch it cow
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"and now a cow playing tennis against farmer stinky thumbs arbuckle when the farmer makes an obvious bad call"
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[tennis ball being hit]
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Farmer: that was out
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Cow: moo
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Farmer: don't tell me it wasn't cause I saw it and that was out
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Cow: moo
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Farmer: by at least 3 feet that's how far, come in look there is still a mark where it's out
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Cow: moo
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Farmer: don't tell that was from an old ball, that was this ball and this ball was out
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Cow: mrr
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Farmer: you cannot see from that angle
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Cow: moo
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"and now a cow receives a phone call who he thinks is from a famous actor but he soon finds out it's just a practical joke"
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[phone rings, cow picks it up]
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Farmer: hello may I speak to the cow
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Cow: moo
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Farmer: hi, I'm a famous actor
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Cow: moo
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Farmer: oh, thank you very much, I was wondering if you would like to go to dinner with me
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Cow: moo
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Farmer: why don't I make reservations?
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Cow: moo
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Farmer: and why don't I tell you my real name? farmer stinky thumbs arbuckle
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Cow: mrr
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Farmer: take that fatty
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Cow: mrr
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[slams down phone]
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"and now a cow gets his revenge on farmer stinky thumbs arbuckle"
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[car sounds]
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Farmer: pull over, pull the vehicle to the side of the road, I am warning you for the last time.
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[car hits farmer]
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Farmer: oooh
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Cow: mooooooooooooo
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