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Ex-Boyfriend
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Lil Dicky
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1
Hey whats going on man, It’s your boy Lil Dicky
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Aka Mr. Leftward sloping penis
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I got a story for you all now â€" Yes sir.
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Now I been dating this girl named Katie, she hot as hell
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And her body crazy, vagina shaven and it don’t smell
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And I don’t fall for chickens, but this one a little different
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Body sickening, plus she really good at making breaded chicken
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Got me thing she the one man, even fully clothed, shawty really fun
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Get a lotta hos, but none of those come close
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I swear this the most that I’ve felt so damn exposed
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Oh yeah, there’s one more thing and I know this shit gonna sound insane
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But I still haven’t hit it I admit it, I wish I was kidding
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Never been up inside before, because she’s only fuck one guy before
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And though I really wanna boink this whore
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She my sweetie 3.14
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So I’m staying patient, and masterbating, and now my heart is sorta racing
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Cuz she said tonight will be the night we do some fornicating
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Hell yeah, I’m down, I’m about to go all out
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I’m gonna poud that crazy, like an elaborate black man handshake
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But on the way to the crib, we pass this kid, and he seem to know who Katie is
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So I say “who this†and she say dicky, this is my ex boyfriend Jim
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And I ain’t usually the one to be the jealous type
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But as I’m looking at this dude I can’t believe my eyes
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Cuz he’s the best looking guy that I’ve seen in my whole life
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He’s got the thickest head of hair, chiseled jaw, an egregious bod
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Man this the closest thing I’ve seen to a Grecian god
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And now I’m looking at my chick, cuz his dick’s been inside her raw
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Aww damn
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Man this is crazy, I can’t believe this guy used to fuck my lady
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I bet he left that pussy ravaged like Haiti
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Katie’s huggin and squeezing his shoulder blades
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And I’m buggin and queasy, this aint okay
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And then they say, “let’s get drinks†so I say okay
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Even though I was about to get laid
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Man this mafucka look like Ashton, combined with a lil Hugh Jackman
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In other words, he’s so damn attractive
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So damn tan he gotta have a little black in him
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Now I’m in the back with him, sippin on some yak with him
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And he paying for it all, he investment banking
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I’m acting, like I aint distracted
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But I’m reenacting him and Katie banging
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An dnow I’m feeling pissed, so I go and take a piss
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Mid stream, I look left and guess who it is
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And I had to see, and I was mad discrete
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And I got on my toes and I took a little peek
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Oh my god Becky, look at that cock
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And I ain’t usually the one to be the jealous type
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But as I’m looking at his dick, I can’t believe my eyes
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Cuz he’s got the biggest cock that I’ve seen in my whole life
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And now I’m staring at this dude’s soft dick with a lotta hate
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Because the shit is plus 8 like Jon and Kate
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And I don’t know if I can date my girl after tonight
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Aw damn
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I don’t know what to do, dude’s dick is really huge
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I didn’t realize a penis could be so smooth
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I know she’s missing that, my penis isn’t that
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I’m looking closer, I think that his dick has abs
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Six pack on a dick, now what the fuck is that
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It’s so long and thick, It’s like a punching bag
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I’m saying it’s so shaven, head is amazing
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Got my dick looking like a raisin
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Skin tone insane, man he’s hung like Saddam Hussain, its crazy
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What the fuck should I do?
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He gotta Ruth’s Chris dick, and mine’s a drive thru
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I think it’s time to tell Katie my goodbyes
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Cuz I simply can’t survive
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After seeing what was in between his thighs, so I tell her
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That this dude’s gotta dick that I don’t comprehend
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I had to move my neck to see it end to end
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I mean the physics of his dick just don’t make any sense
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And I think it’s for the best if this comes to an end
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Because the sex with him must have been the best
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And I would say let’s just be friends
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But I think I would just think about his dick all the time, so goodbye
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Then she told me dicky I don’t really know what to say
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Because I dated this dude in second grade
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So I don’t know about his dick, now let’s go home and get you laid
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And then I took her to my crib, and you know that we belly slapped
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And I gave her an O like I was selling crack, and when I came
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I pulled out and nutted all over her left thigh. Aww damn
Lil Dicky - Ex-Boyfriend (Official Video...
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