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PLASTIC PADDY
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Eric Bogle
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"Plastic Paddy"
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-Eric Bogle
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Hup! dee diddle-ee diddle-ee diddle-ee diddle-ee diddle-ee diddle-ee dah
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Hup! dee diddle-ee diddle-ee diddle-ee diddle-ee diddle-ee diddle-ee dah
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Hup! dee diddle-ee diddle-ee diddle-ee diddle-ee diddle-ee diddle-ee dah
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Hup! dee diddle-ee diddle-ee diddle-ee diddle-ee diddle-ee diddle-ee dah
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Hup! dee diddle-ee diddle-ee diddle-ee diddle-ee diddle-ee diddle-ee dah
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He's just a Plastic Paddy, singin' Plastic Paddy songs
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In a Plastic Paddy pub that they call The Blarny Stone
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There's plastic shamrocks everywhere, there's Guinness and green beer
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And a sign in gaelic above the bar which says "God Bless All Here"
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His guitar sounds like a wardrobe, and it's out of tune at that
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His singin' voice it ranges from a sharp to a flat
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He's just desecrated "The Holy Ground", ripped apart "Black Velvet Band"
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Sang some nights drunk and now he's sunk "The Irish Rover" with all hands
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'Cause he's just a Plastic Paddy, singin' Plastic Paddy songs
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In a Plastic Paddy pub that they call The Blarny Stone
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The publican's a proddy Scot by the name of McIntyre
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Who does not allow collections for the men behind the wire
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He's done awful things to "Molly Malone" and "The Farrows of Tralee"
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He's murdered "Carach Fergus" and poor old "Mother Machree"
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He's just thrashed his way through "Galway Bay" and "The Wild Irish Rose"
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And if he starts singing "Danny Boy", I'm gonna punch him in the nose!
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He's just a Plastic Paddy, singin' Plastic Paddy songs
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In a Plastic Paddy pub that they call The Blarny Stone
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There's Aer Lingus posters everywhere showing pretty Irish scenes
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All peaceful and idyllic, and very bloody green!
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"When Irish Eyes are Smiling" and "The Mountains of Mourne"
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In a central Celtic chichй, the man has left no stone unturned
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'Til he embarks upon the harp that once through terraced halls
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Accompanying himself on the Bodhrб, which takes a lot of courage
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'Cause he's just a Plastic Paddy, singin' Plastic Paddy songs
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In a Plastic Paddy pub that they call The Blarny Stone
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Now he's just sung in his mother tongue, "The Ancient Irish Curse"
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And cleared the pub completely by the forty-second verse!
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'Cause he's just a Plastic Paddy, singin' Plastic Paddy songs
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He's started singin' "Danny Boy", so it's time that I was gone
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And just one thought comes to my mind, as I stagger through the door
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Where are you when we need you, Christy Moore?
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Where are you when we need you, Christy Moore?
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*************
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Note: Christy Moore is a popular folk singer in the UK and Europe, but probably not well known in the US.
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