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I Hate Mondays
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Devo Spice
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1
Ugh, I can't get up right now, man.
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I don't feel good.
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Who the hell decided
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that morning needed to come so early?
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(chorus 1)
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That party last night was awfully crazy
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I got so wasted
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Now I'm hung over and threw up so much
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I can still taste it
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I drink some coffee, pop some speed
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But four days sleep is what I need
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Passed out at five, got class at eight
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Smash my alarm, I can not see straight
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Man I hate Mondays
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(verse 1)
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I only got college for another three weeks
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Trying to pass, I cheat off the geeks
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For that to work I have to get to class
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Which means, I really have to move my ass
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So fill up my cup, coffee straight up
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I drive in a daze like huh, who, what?
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I make it to class but don't feel great
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A one hour class, I'm fifty minutes late
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Got a pop quiz, don't know what the topic is
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Gonna have to take it, guess I'll just fake it
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See the worried faces, all over the places
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Pray to three gods just to cover all the bases
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(chorus 2)
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That party rocked, for three days straight
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We celebrated
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Hell must've froze, I can't believe
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I graduated
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My term paper wasn't great
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GPA was 1.8
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Got my degree, so I bid adieu
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But now I'm late for an interview
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(bridge 1)
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Man I hate Mondays (HEY!)
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I hate mornings (HEY!)
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I hate showers (HEY!)
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Man I hate Mondays
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(verse 2)
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I can't tell you what I learned in school
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But, it didn't prepare me to become a tool
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Um, there are things I never thought I'd do
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Like pay close attention to detail
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And I can't check personal email
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And logic is never gonna prevail
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Only two people here are female
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And I think one might be a she-male
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And my paycheck, nowhere near what I thought
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Now I can't afford the TV I just bought
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Out of tequila, beer, wine, and rum too
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Watching The Bachelor, is this what it's come to?
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(chorus 3)
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That office party was awfully lame
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I wish I skipped it
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Brown-nose the boss, so insincere
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It sounded scripted
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I cut my hair and shave my beard
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And now it's me who thinks I look weird
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Go home at eight, in bed by ten
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Just watch the news, then do it again
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(bridge 2)
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Man I hate Mondays (HEY!)
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I hate Tuesdays (HEY!)
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I hate Wednesdays (HEY!)
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Man I miss college
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(interlude)
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Now, I'm gonna give you a taste, of what I go through on Monday mornings. A typical day goes something like this.
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*beep!* *beep!* *beep!* *beep!*
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*beep!* *beep!* *beep!* *beep!*
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(radio voice: Traffic on the 405 is at a total stand-still this morning as all lanes are closed in both directions due to an accident involving two tractor trailers, seven cars, an ice cream truck, and the Oscar Meyer Wiener Mobile. Traffic is being rerouted onto surface streets but they're moving about as fast as an old lady in the express lane paying with a check.)
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Coffee! Coffee!
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Coffee! Coffee!
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Sittin' in traffic! Sittin' in traffic!
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Sittin' in traffic! Sittin' in traffic!
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Dammit, I'm late again. I hope my boss doesn't see... hey! Good morning, sir! No, I've been here for 20 minutes. I just had to go get something out of my car. Yes, with my briefcase. I don't go anywhere without it. No, not even the bathroom.
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(chorus 4)
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That office meeting we had left me
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Permanently scarred
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PowerPoint slides with cheesy graphics
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And crappy clip art
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Was ill-prepared and underdressed
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And there weren't no donuts left
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Proactive this, synergy that
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Then something 'bout wearin' different hats
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(outro)
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But after a few days of that, it's the weekend.
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You know what that means.
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It means I get to cut the grass, clean out the gutters, and take the kids to soccer.
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Do I really have to make the bed? Why can't I just leave it like that?
The Boomtown Rats - I Don't Like Mondays...
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