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Kate Tempest
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1
She was a smart kid
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Smart girl, soft eyes
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Took in a hard world and saw it
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Fast forward
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She's moving for money in bars full of tourists
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She's moved up to massage
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She's happy, she's in charge
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Talking to clients
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Adoring the silence
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Of after the session
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Her and the night air
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How to be more than the sum of your parts?
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She knows how they see her but they don't know half
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I never wanted to be anybody other
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Than the person that I am
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And the things that I discovered
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In the circles that I ran
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Have been difficult and humbling
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Some don't understand
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But I'm happiest when struggling
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She's not reluctant to touch
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It's the one thing
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That must bring us closer together
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It's such an important endeavour
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To feel tender
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She can't believe there are some
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Who have never been held in their lives
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Eight months in a boardroom
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Three on the motorway
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One in a small room
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Watching the dawn loom large over grey bricks
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It's not sordid, it's sacred
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To open them up to the warmth
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Of her nature; it's ancient
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She don't wanna do it forever
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But let's face it
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Wages are fucked
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And rent is outrageous
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Some might say that she's being degraded
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But she makes her own mind up
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Knows her own morals
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She don't care 'bout how most people see it
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One man's certain is another man's squabble
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Life's to be lived
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Not agreed with
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She's making her living
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And she's making it safely
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Better than slaving away in an office
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Or killing herself to fill some boss's pockets
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Working for peanuts and making them conkers
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I never wanted to be anybody other
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Than the person that I am
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And the things that I discovered
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In the circles that I ran
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Have been difficult and humbling
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Some don't understand
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But I'm happiest when struggling
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Well all of us walk to our own beat
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And each person's rhythm is unique
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You can't hear somebody's tune
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If you count in your time
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You must count their time
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To enjoy how their mind
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Makes its music
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She fell in love with a suitor
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His name was Pete and while she was at work
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He got stoned and watched snooker
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And when she got home he cooked food for them both
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They were happy and close
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But she could feel it pulling at the threads of their tapestry
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Unravelling all that he knew to be true
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He's the type to say, 'This is reality'
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He finds it very hard to alter his view
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But, gradually
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She has felt less and less certain
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That his understanding would stretch
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And now she's got to justify all her decisions
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But he doesn't listen, just gets upset
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But she, in her wisdom, is ready to try
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She thinks of his feelings
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She kisses his neck in the evenings
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Tells him, for them she's a sweet thing
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In-between meetings
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But he has her depth and the whole of her
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But when he's holding her hand
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It feels less like her hand
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And more like his hand
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And when he's kissing her face
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It feels less like her face
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And more like his face
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She's become displaced
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Is she herself?
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Or is she the girl that he wants her to be?
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She tells him, 'I don't want to hurt you
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But your judgements are heavy
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And they're hurting me'
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I never wanted to be anybody other
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Than the person that I am
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And the things that I discovered
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In the circles that I ran
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Have been difficult and humbling
102
Some don't understand
103
But I'm happiest when struggling
Kae Tempest - 'The Beigeness'
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