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My Stunt Double
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Sam Bisbee
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1
After the gig he gets to talk to the girls while I'm moving the equipment back to 39th street
2
And then it's 5:15, he slithers home and I flick on the light, I say, "Where the hell have you been?"
3
He says, "We been sampling rare narcotics in the VIP lounge at Danceteria."
4
He says, "We been slipping fingers on a lap dancing booty eyed groupie caught in stages of hysteria."
5
My stunt double is cooler than me
6
So then I'm walking down the street the next day when a girl I've never seen says, "You were so good last night."
7
She says, "Come back to my hotel room, I want to do it, want to do it again with you, yeah, right now."
8
But afterwards she looks at me, she says, "How could you have made me so impressed?"
9
She says, "I've heard of Jekyll and Hyde, but the way you touched me--I was naked, your hands made me feel like I was fully dressed."
10
My stunt double is cooler than me
11
No one seems to want me since he came along
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