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Christmas Turkey Blues
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Arrogant Worms
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1
Hey kid, why the long face
2
Is it 'cause Santa Clause is flying right over your place
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You've been a bad kid all year
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So quit you snivellin' sucker and wipe up them tears
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You don't deserve a damn thing
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You're not even cute and your attitude stinks
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It must suck to be you
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Nobody likes you so what can you do
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You think you got problems kid, you think you got strife
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But come each December do you fear for your life
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I'm your turkey so your troubles are small
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I'm stuffed on your table, I'm a tasty butterball
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I've got the christmas turkey blues
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If you got your necked ripped out then you'd have them too
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I've got the christmas turkey blues
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You chase me and waste and baste me and taste me and drown me in gravy too
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You sir, you look like heck
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Didn't you get your Christmas bonus cheque
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Or maybe your woman left you
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Ripped your heart right out of your chest and spat on it too
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Is that why you're wreaking of gin
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You look dishevelled and there's drool on your chin
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You thought that this love would laugh
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But she said Merry Christmas baby and she booted your ass
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Well that's tough for you mister, too bad about your ordeal
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How about getting stuffed in the wintertime, see how you feel
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I don't get to yank no bones or make me a wish
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It won't be long til I'm just some scraps on a dish
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I've got the christmas turkey blues
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If your butt was stuffed and roasted then you'd have then too
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I've got the christmas turkey blues
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You chase me and waste and baste me and taste me and drown me in gravy too
Robert Earl Keene's Merry Christmas from...
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