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Fallen Skier
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Mecca Normal
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1
What about this guy
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You can't really see his face
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But he likes opera
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He can't be all bad
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Here, click on this guy's profile.
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I pick the date
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I pick the place for the date
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A radical book store to which he, a 47 year old English student has never been
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Two blocks from where he lives on the downtown east side
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It has a nice little fiction and poetry section
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He crosses the street diagonally and runs his fingers through his hair
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Question and answer we tell our life stories over dinner
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And walking in the tourist sector out of here
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Where cruise ships dock and Americans meander
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Fallen skier, waiter, party guy
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Fallen skier, waiter, party guy
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His favorite place to work was a well known Greek resturant
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Where the staff were encouraged to drink, half price upon arriving for work
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The coke-dealer shows up and the day begins
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Fallen skier, waiter, party guy
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Fallen skier, waiter, party guy
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Own four Cadillac El Derados in Rome
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Self-described waiter/ski bum until he was 39
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Then his parents died
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He didn't handle it very well
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He didn't handle death very well
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He took a room in the creepiest of the crappy skid-row hotels and lost his belongings when he couldn't pay the rent
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Claims he moved down there because that's where the services are
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You've got your rehab and your detox and your counciling you've got your 12 step and your food bank
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Warning, warning, red flag
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No one moves to skid row to get clean
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No one moves to skid row to get clean
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Will I be playing part of the woman trying to help his life get on track
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Helping him get his life back on track
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Fallen skier, waiter, party guy
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Fallen skier, waiter, party guy
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Standing on the pier
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Half-watching the sun go down
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Cloud of mist is giving great definition to the trees
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Which should have been flat and invisible
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I'm thinking of saying something of how the mist is making things clear
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But I decide to keep that thought to myself
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I feel I'm with a boy
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A very young boy
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He's only been away from home 27 years
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Only 27 summers
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27 winters of partying and skiing
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I guess that's why he hasn't gotten anything together yet
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I don't think he realizes it
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But his life has gotten away from him
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After quitting school in grade 11, he bought a van so he could go on ski trips to Vermont
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He didn't leave home until he was 20
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Fallen skier, waiter, party guy
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Fallen skier, waiter, party guy
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I ask about his plans
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He might like to go backpacking in Europe
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Skiing in Switzerland
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But not while he's still a student
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I cannot make him a 47 year old man
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He remains a boy
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Tall, skinny, boyish features
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With that faded, worried look
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Fallen skier, waiter, party guy
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Slips into an anxious silence
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I feel the urge to ask what's wrong
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Oh God, let me not start with that
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I think he may have run out of things to say
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I told my Reader's Digest version of my life over dinner
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Which makes me realize that I could probably pitch my novel in 2 minutes as a screen play
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He gave no indication of being attracted to me
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No compliments, no lingering looks across the table intending to reveal interest
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We didn't talk about relationships or dating expectations
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It was kind of like being stuck with a visiting friend of a friend getting rooked into going out for dinner
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Our conversation was only kind of okay
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Only kind of okay
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Fallen skier, waiter, party guy
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Fallen skier, waiter, party guy
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Near the end
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Out on the pier
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After the sun has gone down
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He asks me about this music of mine
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Is it ever all out punk?
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He seems concerned that it might be hardcore punk
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I stand, middle aged woman in a fantastically subtle silk jacket all the way from Japan, Hush Puppies, curly hair flowing in the wind
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And this guy's fretting over the possibility that I'm actually Henry Rollins
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I try to explain punk myself
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But fail on making an impact here
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He never did ask the name of my band
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He never tried to touch me
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Fallen skier, waiter, party guy
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I ask what sort of music he listens to
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He says his taste is eclectic
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My least favorite answer to a question meant to increase understanding
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Eclectic in this case means that music isn't really that important to him
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Isn't really that important to him
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He says his taste varies, but he's never been into the live music scene
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Never been, never been into the live music scene
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After eclectic comes techno
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And I'm still trying to make him 47
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But he's stuck in my mind a boy
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A boy that might backpack around Europe once he finishes school
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Fallen skier, waiter, party guy
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Carefully, I ask if he does anything I might call creative
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Perhaps he finds creative expression making an espresso, a cappaucino
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I don't know
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Thinks a minute and says he doesn't play music or paint, if that's what I mean
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But he does watch TV
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Free cable in his creepy, freaky hotel room
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And he likes to go, he likes to go to the movies, to the movies
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I can only half think about being so gray and dispassionate to call watching TV creative
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I guess to him, art is a hobby
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And his hobby is being entertained
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The sun is down and I blurt out
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"I've got to get back to the other side of town"
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At my bus stop I ask him if I can give him a hug
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I mean, a hug goodbye
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We hug, and he cheers up and decides to wait with me for the bus
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Fallen skier, waiter, party guy
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By the time I get home
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His email to ask me out again
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I should've skipped the hug
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I go to bed, rather than him reply
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Perhaps he's on antidepressants and he's psychotic
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My internet dating experience
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I want to get back
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I want to get back tomorrow
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Fallen skier, waiter, party guy
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Fallen skier, waiter, party guy
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