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Loopholes
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Pope Jane
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1
I was walking down the pier one day
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Little ol' man stumbled in my way
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He was the kind with mud in his beard
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Bloodshot eyes, saliva smeared
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He wore a coat of musty grey
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Smelled him from a block away
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Fingers blackened with the sands of time
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He said, "Sister, can you spare a dime?"
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I said, "Hey what do I look like to you?
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Money bags or just a fool? I work harder than you do."
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His palsied head rolled to the sky
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The watery moon blinked in his eyes
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And then I realized and said, "Oh. I didn't know it was you."
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He said, "Oh, look at you, aren't you a heartstopper!
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Haven't seen you since you were knee high to a grasshopper!"
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"Oh," I said, "you really look bothered.
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Don't expect to be called Pop, Daddy, or Father.
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You brought me to this stinking place, promised me
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Safety, promised me grace, you lied about the world.
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You said: 'Just be upstanding, you'll do fine.
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Don't put your pearls before the swine.'
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But I learned something over time
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A swine's diet is pearls."
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He said
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I never said it would be easy
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I only said it would be worth it
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When you're sitting on death's doorstep
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And you know the life you lead has not been perfect
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I will stand up for your honor
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I will stand up for your soul
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And if that ain't good enough for ol' God Himself
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Then I'll hold out my hands to pose these loopholes
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I asked, "Why are there sick? Why is there pain?
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Why can some walk, and why are some lame?
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Please tell me all the answers to your game.
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I ask this in a prayer, and the end's in your name."
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He said, "That was never in my plane, to leave you
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standing here without a little helping hand.
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Please understand, somebody took my name and ran
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Made a fool of who I am, turned me into a fraud
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In the name of God."
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And He said
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I never said it would be easy
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I only said it would be worth it
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When you're sitting on death's doorstep
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And you know the life you lead has not been perfect
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I will stand up for your honor
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I will stand up for your soul
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And if that ain't good enough for ol' God Himself
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Then I'll hold out my hands to pose these loopholes
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He said, "Why'd you buy all of their lies
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saying I'd leave you here behind, because you did not tithe?
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Well, go and tell all of your friends the second coming will begin
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not from fire in the sky--but from fire within."
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And He said
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I never said it would be easy
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I only said it would be worth it
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When you're sitting on death's doorstep
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And you know the life you lead has not been perfect
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I will stand up for your honor
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I will stand up for your soul
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And if that ain't good enough for ol' God Himself
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Then I'll hold out my hands to pose these loopholes (x2)
The Loophole by Garfunkel and Oates
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