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If Dirt Were Dollars
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Don Henley
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1
Walkin' like a millionaire
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Smilin' like a king
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He leaned his shopping cart against the wall
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He said, "I been a lot of places
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And I seen a lot of things
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But, sonny, I seen one thing that beats 'em all
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I was flyin' back from Lubbock
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I saw Jesus on the plane...or maybe it was Elvis
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You know, they kinda look the same
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Hey, look out, Junior, you're steppin' on my bed"
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I said, "I don't see nothin"
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He just glared at me and said,
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If dirt were dollars
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If dirt were dollars
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If dirt were dollars
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I wouldn't worry anymore
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Lookin' like a beauty queen
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Loyal as a wife
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She raised her little voice and testified,
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"I am a good girlI've been one all my life"
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But her virtue was as swollen as her pride
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She should've had the Oscar
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She must have been miscast
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Her fifteen minutes went by so fast
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I said, "Now, baby, have you got no shame?"
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She just looked at me, uncomprehendingly
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Like cows at a passing trainIf dirt were dollars
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If dirt were dollars
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If dirt were dollars
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I wouldn't worry anymore
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We got the bully pulpit
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And the poisoned pen
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We got a press no better
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Than the public men
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This brave new world
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Gone bad again
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God's finest little creatures
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Looking brave and strong
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Whistling past the graveyard
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Nothing can go wrong
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Quoting from the scriptures
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With patriotic tears
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We got the same old men
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With the same old fears
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Standing at attention
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Wrapped in stars and stripes
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They hear the phantom drummers
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And the nonexistent pipes
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These days the buck stops nowhere
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No one takes the blame
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But evil is still evilIn anybody's name
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If dirt were dollarsIf dirt were dollars
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If dirt were dollars
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We'd all be in the black
Don Henley - The Heart Of The Matter (Of...
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