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Different Love
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Joe Budden
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[Verse:]
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It go - off of my sabbatical
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Took a few years cause Slaughter is what I had to do
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Which only brings me to now and I ought to be a radical
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I say that cause my autobiographical is more so just a graph of you
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I ain't mad, you did more than what I asked of you
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As for me, I did less than what I could've
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So though we were a hit I had to cancel that show
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And now my standing solo, I'll be amped when she not a ho
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But what you doing right now is real commendable
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Take strength to do
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Cause between us there's some deep root stare
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I gave you the best dick you ever got in your life
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And stupid me thought it would be enough to keep you there
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I thought you loved football
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I was running through the hole with the stiff on
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But got disarmed, guess it was just harm
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I ain't need to fuck, I was looking for a peer
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They say once you stop looking what you looking for appears
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You were stronger than I pictured you, much stronger than me
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And almost just as strong as John
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And John, oh, that's just a friend of my moms
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With tubes coming out his nose, but shit I never knew why
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But he was born with his heart in the right side of his chest
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No, for real, his heart is in the right side of his chest
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Doctors confused, they must do what they can do
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But impute and say it ain't on the right side of his chest
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Scared he might die in his sleep, deep
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Every time he coughs wonders if it's a cough or a symptom
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Us will get better later
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He gon' live his whole life waking up every morning to a respirator
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So I don't never say what I can't do
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If he can be happy with life than nigga I can too
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While Jose wanna die
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Ain't tell nobody, but eyeing his eyes feel I should probably identify
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I said everyday he lives with pain and want to end it
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Something's wired wrong in your brain, you gotta mend it
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Had a bad breakup and let it expose dude
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But if she was getting you high then she would get you low too
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So who's there to wait on me?
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Y'all just get it off y'all and put the weight on me
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Nigga look me in my eyes, it was amazing to me
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And said she don't understand you not as crazy as me
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You got gone, nigga, I'm the most mentally flawed nigga
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You not even built to withstand what all I've endured, nigga
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You know shit about the thoughts in my head
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Or the strength I need daily just to get out of bed
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Just to open my eyes, nigga, open your eyes
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The words spoken of wise, you just know it in disguise
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We can end this right here, I got nothing more to say to you
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You ain't never met another fucking nigga crazier
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Blank stare, couldn't believe 'em
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Cat chastised me cause I got help when you need some
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I can give less than a fuck and not a damn
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I never be apologetic over who I am
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I'm the same me, nothing changes when the riches do
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But niggas wanna suck you dry just like the bitches do
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They enter your mentions, sucks to be the center of attention
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When you can't even center your attention
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Yeah, so I'm fucking out of frustration
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They love every second and accuse me of persuasion
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Jam was a cancer to me, I had to rid it
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Red got in her feelings fast, but won't admit it
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Dawn I was bored then, never really smithen
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V got threatened by the thought of competition
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Malo wanna fuck all day, don't know how
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She why I got a Viagra in my wallet right now
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Step kept it simple, loved me for my mental
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B got a nigga, but she used me as her rental
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And you, you just give me resistance
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Say you needed comfort zone, for you it's distance
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I tell 'em all I'm not available emotionally
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They start giving me advice like they coaching me
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I don't even ask it
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It's something about bipolar sociopath shit
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They just find it attractive
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Yeah, anti-social, but I mingle now
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But I've been arguing much more since I've been single, how?
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Tell me is this a relationship or just a fuckship?
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Whatever situation it is it's all fuck shift
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I'll admit it, I might love her a bit differently
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As for them they'll all love to see a different me
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Some cried to me, some are begging for it
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Someone'll see that change, but not be present for it
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You just act so frightened
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Ignoring all logic now, she won't buy in
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Even in your absence my feelings are heightened
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Though I know some love's lost, it's not on my end
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It's not mine, it's not mine at all
Different Love
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