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FOXAL
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1
Yeah,
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Sometimes I feel like I'm climbing to the top of a broken ladder.
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Serving up Silver on a Golden platter.
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Pitching a fastball to an absent batter,
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And cleaning off glass that's already shattered.
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Pitting myself up against the hatred and laughter,
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People telling me that I'm not a "real rapper".
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Tellin myself that what you think about me don't matter.
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Because these ain't your dreams, I'm chasing after.
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I'm just looking for purpose, some meaning or fate,
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Wondering why every single dream that I've chased,
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Came close enough to taste but then, slipped away.
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I found my meaning in the simplest of things.
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I put the tip of a pen to my paper and my brain grew wings.
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I found that I love this feeling, and all the things that it brings,
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I found my calling in a room full of beaten down dreams.
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Space stations they're disguising as stars,
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Choose to be a light in a world full of dark.
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I thought I loved a girl but realized that we're better apart,
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But at that moment didn't know if it was my brain or my heart.
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My soul is here for you to take it or leave it,
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I see by the look on your face I know that you can barely believe it.
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You thought you knew me before I started making all this music,
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I knew I wouldn't be an artist until the moment I choose it.
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How come we're all afraid of our own flaws?
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People tell me the world's just dogs eating dogs,
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Trust me, my man, you don't want none of these jaws,
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I'll bite ya face off and then I'll pause for applause.
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It's hard to find meaning, that's what I know.
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How's a girl supposed to feel worth something when y'all calling her a hoe
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To her face,
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Just so you feel better about yo own mistakes.
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Wondering you look in the mirror and see someone fake.
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So say what you want, just know that I stopped listening.
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At the end of the day, I know that I won't be missing ya.
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In fact,
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Why am I wasting these lines even taking the time to write about someone
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Like you?
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I don't know.
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I may be different.
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And you may not like it.
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But imma stay this way.
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Even despite the way you say that I been changing lately feeling like
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You're out the loop
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But the loop is full of lack of truth the things you hear aren't who I am,
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That's why I write.
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To take a stand to show you all that I'm the man!
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Now it's time you play your hand let's run it back, to where it all began.
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I don't remember.
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Was it in July or some cloudy November or September?
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If there's one thing that I wish it's that I could be a better son,
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A better brother to my sisters better in all that I've done.
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If you're listening just know that my times just begun
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It's funny how you can be freezing standing right beneath the Sun.
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Have you ever had so much to say that you spend all day wondering if you
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Should stay or if you should go your way?
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Cause I have.
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I found my meaning in the simplest of things.
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I put the tip of a pen to my paper and my brain grew wings
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I found that I love this feeling, and all the things that it brings,
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I found my calling in a room full of beaten down dreams.
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You're staring like I'm wearing all my clothes inside out.
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If only you would've given me the benefit of the doubt.
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I doubted myself first and look what I've found.
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I don't need drugs to get high when I float right off of the ground.
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I don't look down anymore, I'm not afraid to fall.
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I got a focus so hard boy, call me Adderall.
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She knows that I love her, I know that's why she never calls.
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You fighting some petty shit, I'm fighting for a different cause.
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I started discovering myself as I grew much older.
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Found that over time it feels like my heart grew colder.
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I remember the first time, you cried in my shoulder.
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It felt like the time around me started going much slower.
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I found my purpose deep within myself.
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I realized that if was a book I'd be way up on the third shelf,
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Slowly rotting away, but then one fateful day,
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I picked up a pen and started writing my story, my way.
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Now I can't stop writing, like I've found my true calling.
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Planted my feet down realized that I've been free falling.
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All the time that I wasn't creating, I was just stalling.
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If my life's gonna be a fight I'm gonna be out here brawling.
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It's gonna be a journey, but I don't feel nervous.
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I've spent way too much of my life feeling worthless.
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It's up to me to find my own living purpose.
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With every rhyme I write I know I'm just scratching the surface.
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