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Shelma
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sometimes i think i should give up on my friends
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all they do is weigh me down
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and it's my walls that i treasure, it's my walls i will keep
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they keep the wind from being so mean to me
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sometimes i think i should give up on my songs
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they keep me believing that i'm something that i'm not
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but it's the figurative heart, and selected parts of my brain
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that keep me believing this until i rot
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that it's them it's not me
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they have no backbone
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but it's a problem, it's my problem
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and i'll deal with it alone
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and i'm a sucker for the sorest eyes
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cause they keep me from
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and i hate surprise
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i like to keep the air thick, cause i'm a selfish little girl
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it keeps me from going out and doing more in the world
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like forgiving or forgetting or returning those calls
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excepting formal connections, or giving in at all
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i like to make it difficult, it's the only thing that saves me in the long run
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and if i never speak to you again, if i stop looking at your face
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it's because i loved you
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and it's you, yeah it's you
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and you hurt me
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but it's ok, it's your life
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you're gonna live it as you please
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and it's a truth of the w*orld
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but i get lonely
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and when i do i take it very personally
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i should stop expecting gift cards to be ponys
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leaving trails of bread crumbs to lead people to care about me
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and it's me it's no them
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i think i'm different
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but the storys are all the same it's just the lyrics
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well i learn to love you and then i learn to let you go
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funny that you never learn to come back
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you get sad and you cry, say you're always gonna be alone
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you sound so stupid
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and i've got blood and you've got blood and it's as thick as they say
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but you don't, so why should i be the one to stay
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and there's an ethic in telling somebody that you hate them
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and there's a reason that i
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grind my teeth, hold my grudges, never let you see me cry
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and it's you, and after years you learned to hurt me
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you took my offerings, gave me dirt and said they didn't mean a thing
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and i'll take it as my cue to turn my back, learn to hate you and hopefully
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try to finally put this to sleep
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