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Particle Board
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Arrogant Worms
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1
Well my baby came at me with a 2x4
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So I fought her off with sandpaper
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It was 60 grit, it was really rough
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And it made a lot of sawdust
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But we patched things up with love and glue
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We went to the church and said "I do"
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Our honeymoon was at a hardware store
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Our love's a lot like particle board
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Particle Board, it ain't got no grain
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Unless you paint it with a darkwood stain
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Particle Board, it doesn't take no brains to know that
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Our love's a lot like particle board
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Well I heard the train come rolling by
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With cattle on board, so we decided
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We should drop everything and hop that train
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And take a one-way trip to the slaughterhouse
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Well we stared at the cattle as they took the walk
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To meet the man who worked the saw
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We stared at the blood and the guts and the gore
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It looked an awful lot like particle board
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Particle Board, it ain't got no grain
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Unless you paint it with a darkwood stain
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Particle Board, it doesn't take no brains to know that
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Our love's a lot like particle board
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We made love on a flat bed truck
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She worried about getting splinters in her butt
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I said don't think about those problems when we rut
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The deck's made of particle board
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Ahh, ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
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Particle board, you could make a dresser
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Or a shelf or a hutch or an ottoman
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You could leave it like it is or paint it up
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It's still gonna be made of particle board
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Particle board, it's useful stuff
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It's stronger than glue, it's better than fluff
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It sounds like a simile and that's enough
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To say that our love's a lot like particle board
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Our love's a lot like particle board
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Our love's a lot like particle board
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Our love's a lot like particle board
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Ahh, ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
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Particle Board!
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