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Liquid Joy
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Andrew Sisneros
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1
My life started last night when I got the strength to look you in the eyes.
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It was everything I needed to finally realize.
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What I've been doing is not living.
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All the girls and all the driving around.
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It was a complete waste of time, nothing worth finding was found.
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I didn't add up but I sure learned a lot.
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Big parties, fine cut lines, and being something you're not.
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How am I supposed to know where to look?
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Some people find God in parking lot.
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In a parking lot.
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I think I'll live in the mountains and forge my own fate.
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Or build myself and ark and drag along an ocean that I made.
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Try to tell myself it was all from liquid joy, and not tears or rain.
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I try not to sound too ungrateful t just comes out that way.
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Another conversation, just another day.
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I'm tired of doing nothing.
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And I'm tired of watching my memories play over and over in my head.
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It's night and all I managed to do was sit.
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I watched the sun do the same old thing.
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It woke up and went to bed.
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How can something so beautiful become so boring I said.
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So boring I said.
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Is liquid joy happiness or is it a big ol bottle of booze?
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And what is a man?
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Is it a lifestyle you choose?
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I just want to start from scratch sometimes.
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Learn to live with no possessions and not a single pint of envy or a single ounce of hate.
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Just happiness that can be eaten off a shiny dinner plate.
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Because my eyes are hungry lions.
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You're breath smells like the city when its rained.
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We walked hands held through many tunnels and caves.
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And when the sleepy bats asked us who we were.
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We forgot our names.
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We only knew each other by face.
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We were more then strangers.
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In a more than familiar place.
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How can we forget something we've know forever?
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And sometimes I wonder if Jesus ever forgot his manger.
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And if liquid joy tears of happiness or smiling bottle of 190 proof.
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And what is a man?
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It's not something you're just born into.
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