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Dee Wee (My Friend The Massive Idiot)
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Adam Sandler
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1
He said he'd be here at seven
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The clock just hit 7:22
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It's too cold outside
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To wait for my ride
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Watching mamma try out a new doo (Bruins)
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He said he'd be here at seven
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But it just hit 7:35 (already?)
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Here in Brockton, Mass.,
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I got my thumb in my ass
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Mamma's combing up a big beehive (Celtics)
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Where the fuck is he?
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Where the fuck is he?
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The bitch doesn't even bother calling
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Even though it's 7:44 (I fell asleep, pally)
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I'm feeling kinda antsy
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Mamma's getting fancy
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Slicking back a wet pompadour (Red Sox)
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He said he'd be here at seven
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It's closing in on 8:01 (Trimmin' the 'stache, kid)
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Me lookin' like a sap
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In a wool knit cap
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Mamma's next move is a bun (fuckin' Patriots)
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Where the fuck is he? (My pants are still in the dryer, dude)
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Where the fuck is he? (I couldn't find my fuckin' snowboots, pal)
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I wish I had a car (Huge, huge hangover)
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Oh, no (Massive hailstorm, massive hailstorm, massive)
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That stupid little punk
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He's probably fuckin' drunk
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I bet he drank a case
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Want to pop him in the face right now
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Mamma's eyebrow
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Wicked good
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Wicked good (Oh, GOD)
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Wicked good
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Wicked good (Fuck yeah)
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Wicked good
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Wicked good (Pisser?)
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Well my friend is still a no-show
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And I'm getting fucking pissed (Why?)
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'Cause I could've gone with Charlie
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In the side of his Harley
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Mamma's on the phone with a stylist (Fuck Charlie!)
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So I guess I ain't going out tonight
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'Cause the digits say 12:09 (Shit-faced)
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But call the operator
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'Cause one perm later
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Mamma's hair sure do look fine (Heffenreffer!!!)
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Where the fuck is he? (Ah, ha ha! My stepfather was tellin' me a wicked funny joke!)
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Where the fuck is he? (Ah, ha ha! I forgot it though)
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I wish I had a car
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I wish I had a car (A cop pulled me over, buddy)
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I wish I went with Charlie (5.2 blood level, state record)
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I could have gone with Charlie (I'm in a wicked mess of trouble, ha ha!)
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He gotta dee wee
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He gotta dee wee
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He gotta dee wee
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He got a D.W.I.
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(Up the river)
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(Up the river)
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(Up the river)
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(Up the river)
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(Up the river)
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(Up the river)
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(Up the river)
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(Up the river)
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(Up the river)
The Chanukah Song, Pt. 2 (Live)
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